1. I was born on December 25th 1977. This was the exact day that Charlie Chaplin died. Every year I check to see which celebrities or important people died on my birthday. The most notable and recent was James Brown.
2. It is a common practice for me to withhold my “Merry Christmas” wishes to my family until they say “Happy Birthday” first. Being that I was born on a holiday people tend to forget that I’m even there. This includes my own father sometimes.
3. I am a geek through and through. I’ll never deny my geekhood. But for the sake of at least getting a girlfriend I do not revel in it. (Because no one loves a geek. So stop it!)
4. I have collected and viewed copious amounts of anime and foreign films. At one point I had a spreadsheet documenting it all.
6. I still consider all my ex-girlfriends as good friends.
7. I can often be found haunting coffee shops. Very rarely will it be a mainstream shop. The smaller and locally owned shops are my favorite. They seem to have a lot more atmosphere and personality.
8. I will do odd jobs for free coffee. At one point I had made friends with the employees of a coffee shop I visited regularly. After a while I would help them in their closing procedures by mopping the floor and cleaning in exchange for a few cups of coffee.
9. I have very long slender fingers. Due to this people say that I should play the piano or guitar. Yet an artist I be.
10. I have been known to collect action figures. I also collect other strange or bizarre odds and ends.
11. I am a straight 30 year old male with four pet rabbits. A lot of people I know think that this is odd. They believe that rabbits are a very un-guy type of pet. Sometimes I agree with them but I’d never give up my bunny buddies. They call me “The Rabbit Whisperer” every now and then.
12. I like to mix up words to create a new one. It’s pretty much a brutal murder of the English language. But I enjoy it so much.
13. Lately (for about the past 4 years) I have a hard time sleeping at night. Even when I’m dead tired I’ll stay up to the wee hours of the morning just thinking.
14. Because of my difficulties sleeping I have started taking melatonin pills. They don’t help much unless I take more than 5.
15. I subsist on caffeine. From energy pills and drinks to coffee.
16. When I was around the age of 21 my friend Tom and I created what we called “Aggressive Coffee”. We took a percolator, brewed a pot of coffee, changed the grounds, and ran the coffee through again. We repeated this process a few more times. The result was us not sleeping and running rampant for about 2 days. I’ll make a pot of “Aggressive Coffee”. Sometimes just to see if someone can drink and stomach it.
17. I can drink a pint of rum (straight) and still be alright.
18. I have a super power in which I can drink (sometimes chug) any alcohol straight from the bottle and not vomit despite the taste.
19. The saying of “Beer before liquor, never been sicker. Liquor before beer, in the clear.” does not apply to me. No matter how the two are mixed I’ll end up either throwing up or passing out.
20. Even though I’m an unrepentant filthy smoker I refuse to smoke around children. Anytime I see a child about to pass me I’ll hold my breath until they pass. Anytime I see an adult carting a child and puffing away at a cigarette I get really pissed.
21. I collect the soundtracks to my favorite anime, movies, or shows.
22. In person I may seem standoffish or “angry”. But in truth I’m actually very friendly and somewhat shy.
23. I’m actually stronger, tougher, and more durable than I look.
24. Sometimes my life can be like an anime. Some of the most bizarre stuff happens to me.
25. When I’m drawing in a public place people will come up and compliment me. Sometimes I hate it. It feels like they’re just placating me or saying something just to talk.
26. Years ago I rolled my car. It flipped 4 times and I came out with a faint scar on my forehead and a new mindset. The type of mindset that would say, “What is, is. What shall be, shall be”. A friend called that Zen Stan. (She actually hated it.) “Zen Stan” comes out during times of extreme stress or unhappiness. Sometimes he helps and others he’s just a nuisance.
27. I have a lot of friends who will come to me for relationship advice. During those times I usually respond with, “Hello! Do you not realize who you’re talking to? I’m the single guy who lives alone!”. Even still, most of their problems and solutions seem to be very evident to me. Most likely because I am outside of the situation.
28. I dream in color. I don’t care what anyone says. I swear I dream in color. Vibrant and beautiful color.
29. All in all I consider myself just “average” in everything I do.
30. I can eat a pound of beef without an issue.
31. When I get drunk I like to cook. And even though I’m drunk I make some kick ass meals.
32. I have a hard time sleeping next to someone. There have only been 3 people in my life that I could sleep next to without an issue.
33. I’m not good with “open ends”. I have a bad habit of wanting closure and will haunt people until I achieve it.
34. I’ve never expected to be loved for who I am even though I believe I deserve to be loved. This stems from a very poor self esteem.
35. I hate it when people chew with their mouth open. I’m not talking about the standard. I mean when someone makes the above necessary smacking noises. This activates a very primitive response in me. My first desires are to start yelling and hitting. I become very volatile. I will glare at that person if I’m in the room. It takes a lot of will power for me to keep from shouting. The louder the sound the more ire is raised. If that person is the type to talk and breathe through their mouth while eating I become even more irate. Also if they start out chewing their mouthful with their mouth closed and end it with loud smacking sounds. (This one gets me because you’ve already shown that you CAN chew with your mouth closed. Therefore when you start with the annoying smacky smacky noises it feels like a challenge.) I also don’t like it when people make those mouth breathing or “mmpph” noises. I don’t know where this comes from.
36. When someone asks me what type of woman I’d prefer to date my usual and most honest answer is, “woman”.
37. I usually eat white rice with a little butter and sugar mixed in.
38. I’m a sucker for meat and potatoes.
39. I show more kindness, compassion, and tolerance for children or animals than I do for adults.
40. The first time I “liked” a girl was when I was in the latter half of the 1st grade living in
41. The second girl I liked was in the same area when I was in the 3rd grade. Her name was Laurie. She used to verbally defend me because I was so soft spoken. We “3rd grade dated” for about a month before deciding that it was “dumb”.
42. I didn’t kiss a girl on the lips until I was 17.
43. I didn’t lose my virginity until I was 21. (Even though I don’t really think I lost it. I believe I sold it for a pack of cigarettes, or gave it to a girl… or something like that.)
44. From 1992 till 2001 I wore a trench coat or duster all year round. Whenever someone joked around and called me part of the “Trench Coat Mafia” I’d get pissed. I still sport my coat from time to time. And I still get pissed when people mention the TCM.
45. I love boiled potatoes.
46. Some of my favorite animals are as follows (listed in order of my fondness of them): Wolf, Sloth, Rabbit, Squirrel, and the Pika.
47. I can’t stand to watch a foreign film dubbed. It’s got to be subtitled.
48. In a relationship I tend to give 100% even if the other person only gives 25%. This has been my downfall every time. You’d think I’d learn my lesson.. but nooooo. Obviously I’m an idiot.
49. I have been diagnosed with a “mild form” of Manic Depression. This is something that I haven’t even told my mother. (Now don’t you feel special?! You get to know something I haven’t told to many, even my own family.)
50. I get angry when people say “Japanimation”.
51. I will listen to almost any genre of music. My most favorite genre is Techno. My most hated are most Country, Rap, and R&B.
52. Because I’m black people tend automatically think that I like R&B, Rap, or that I’m a “thug”. I’m not.
53. As far as I know I am part African American, Native American, German, French, Spanish, Irish, and Indian. There’s probably more but my family hasn’t researched far enough back. The majority on both sides of my family is African American.
54. I’d pick werewolves over vampires any day.
55. I watch at least one movie every night.
56. I tend to wear all black or dark colors a lot. The moment I started wearing brighter colors or khakis my family and friends made such a big deal out of it that I went back to wearing black most of the time.
57. When I was a kid I watched, re-watched, and LOVED Berry Gordy’s “The Last Dragon”. That film had a profound affect on me as a child. I’m still trying to obtain “the glow”. In fact if you mention the movie to me I’ll grin and become very giddy.
59. I am arachnophobic to the point of violence. If I see a spider inside my home I will hunt it until I kill it. The larger the spider the deader I make it. I have been known to victory dance on the corpse of a spider for a few minutes. (There was a time at my mother’s house where I was confronted by a spider as large as my hand. It looked like a wolf spider which I suspect came from the woods behind my mother’s house. The freakishly large thing took a phone book to the face and lived. I literally had to punch it to death. That’s no joke. I went feral and pounded the goliath into the carpet.)
60. I think that guys in pink polo shirts look stupid. That’s just my point of view. I’m sure there are people out there that think it’s great. I’m not one of those people.
61. The madder I get the quieter I get. This builds until I explode. It’s probably not healthy… but I do give warnings.
62. For some reason I can’t stand it when people walk around with the collar to their polo shirts flipped up.
63. Face talkers piss me off. The type of person that has to get in your face and way to close when you’re holding a normal conversation. That drives me nuts. I really don’t need to smell your breath in order to comprehend what you’re saying. This definitely applies to my friends. The only time you’re getting that close to my face is if we’re making out.
64. My family moved around quite a bit when I was younger. I’m originally from
65. My travels have gone as follows:
66. The last two moves I’ve made were because my mother (In Maryland) kicked me out and sent me to live with my father in
67. When I lived in
68. I was the only black kid in my entire grade. It turned out that it was the same for my younger brother at the same school.
69. While I was in All County Chorus my music teacher had us sing “Dixie”. During that time she singled me out and asked me if I knew who wrote the song. When I said I didn’t know she said that because I’m black I should know. I went home later and told my father. He was not pleased and went to the school to have some very not pleased words with her. (By the way. Can anyone explain to me why the color of my skin should dictate that I should know who wrote what song?)
70. I started school when I was 4 (We lived in
71. When I graduated the 5th grade (we lived in
72. Because of my parent’s deciding to have me repeat the 5th grade I ended up older than all the kids in my class from then till I graduated high school.
73.
74. I can drink any type or brand of liquor till it makes me vomit, then go back and drink it the next day. For some reason that whole psychosomatic issue that tends to affect others doesn’t work on me. I’ve been told this is a gift. (Or I’m just a dirty booze hound.)
75. I am the Dark Overlord Of All.
76. Not too long ago I was shaving my head using electric clippers. I had slipped and shaved off my right eyebrow. At that point I decided to shave off the other.
77. Most people didn’t notice the missing eyebrows right away. They’d stare at me and say I looked different. Once I pointed out the eyebrows (or lack thereof) they would stare in utter shock and disbelief.
78. Secretly I loved the way people gawked at stared when they noticed the lack of eyebrows.
79. My eyebrows have grown back in and I am glad.
80. Sometimes I contemplate shaving them off again.
81. The song played during the very last fight scene in “The Last Dragon” still makes me giddy.
82. I try to live my life with no regrets. But there are still a few things that I really do regret. (No I’m not going to list them for you.)
83. I am a Community College dropout. Turns out that you really can’t major in “cafeteria”.
84. While attending community college in
85. I’ve never gone to work drunk.
86. But there have been times where I’ve been so hung over it hurts to think. Those are called “Your voice murders my soul and your stares burn my flesh. Don’t even consider looking at me or else I’ll disembowel you and lynch you with your own intestines” times.
87. I’m at number 87 and I’ve really been digging deep and desperate for things to list since number 29.
88. When I’m bored I will draw really odd pictures with captions that I refer to as the “Little Did You Know” series or odd pictures known as the “Herniated Sanity” series. Here are a few examples: LITTLE DID YOU KNOW and then HERNIATED SANITY
89. I have a younger half sister who I have never met. She is one year older than my full sister who is 8 years younger than me.
90. At the age of 28 I had to have a hernia surgery. I had a ruptures in my abdominal wall and my navel ring. I found out later that the type of hernia I had was common amongst pregnant women and body builders. (Through this I learned that working out or being pregnant are detrimental to one’s health.)
91. I actually like the sound of cicadas.
92. I witnessed the last emergence of the magicicada (17 year cicadas) in
93. Whenever a small child asks me why I smoke, my first reply is “Because I’m stupid”. And I absolutely mean it when I say it.
94. I write poetry.
95. On my work email I receive a lot of spam messages regarding “growth” and increasing “size” in a matter of days with pills. I file these away to show the IT department and because I think the phrasing used in them is hilarious. (I found out that everyone at work has been getting the same emails.)
96. I have been accused of “seething”. For more information take a look at the link. (Conveniently posted just before this list.)
97. Can you tell that I’m really reaching now? I mean there’s only so much I can think to list. If this keeps up I’m just going to resort to listing my measurements, weight, and bathroom schedule. I might have to start making things up. Actually… It’s really not difficult trying to find something to list. The difficulty is in figuring out what to list. I’m not about to divulge every single dirty secret in my life for the whole world to see. (Actually I probably could. It’s not like there’s a ton of you guys reading this.)
98. The quickest and easiest ways to send me into an irrational rage are as follows: 1. Child abuse/neglect/murder. 2. Rape. 3. Throwing a spider of any type or size at me. (As long as you can abstain from doing these three things we can be friends. If not… well then I have to force feed you a brick or twenty.)
99. Sometimes I’ll tell stories of my imaginary wife. No really. I’m not kidding. I have an imaginary wife. Of course she’s pretty much useless as far as a domestic partnership is concerned. She doesn’t work or clean. (Well what would you expect?! She’s imaginary! But she’s so pretty… and she’s nice to me too! The way she looks changes from time to time.)
100. HOLY CRAP! It’s #100! So to cap it off… uh…. Um…. I love sushi. I went through a month where all I ate was sushi and miso soup. That was a very delicious and very expensive month. I’d do it again if I could.
So… I’m done now. That was actually really difficult. I might come back to add or edit this later…. Maybe.
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1 comment:
Before i continue down the list - #29? Just not true. Rawr...
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